DEAR DEIDRE: I AM having amazing sex with the woman I love. The problem is that she works as a prostitute so I worry the feelings she shows for me are just part of the job.
I divorced my wife five years ago. Looking back, we were both too young and unsuited to one another.
We had kids — now grown up — so struggled along pretending all was OK and that we were happy together.
Our sex life gradually diminished until it hardly existed at all.
Eventually, we parted but I missed female company and the chance of good sex — I am only 46.
When a friend told me about an escort he had been seeing, I thought, “Why not”?
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I realised that “escort” would most likely be a cover for something more physical — I certainly hoped that was the case. I was not disappointed.
We met up in a bar, had drinks and chatted. We got on like a house on fire right from the start.
Then she mentioned that she had an arrangement with a small hotel locally. She said she could give them a ring and see if her usual room was available.
The night was all I could have hoped for. I had not had sex like that in years. I arranged to see her again the following week and then the next week after that.
I’ve been seeing her regularly for 18 months now. I think about our next appointment non-stop.
We get on really well. She is 28. I have suggested we meet up at other times just socially but she is always “working” during the week, so that is out. At weekends she sees her family.
I have realised now I am falling in love with her but I fear the warm and loving way she behaves towards me is just part of her job.
She manages to make me feel genuinely special to her but is that just because she is good at her job?
Topic for today
ONE-in-five blokes suffer from loss of sex drive at some point. But there is a lot these men – and their partner – can do.
My e-leaflet Reviving A Man’s Sex Drive explains.
For a copy, email me at [email protected] or private message me on my Dear Deidre Facebook page.
DEIDRE SAYS: The woman you are seeing is good at making men feel special, but she clearly is not up for a personal friendship outside the current business (for her) arrangement she has with you.
You obviously want someone loving to share your life with, so put your energies into finding that person.
If your longing for the woman you’re seeing has taken over your life to the extent you are ignoring ways of meeting your special person, be firm with yourself and rearrange your life so that you have the best chance of making the changes you long for.
Widen your social life so you meet more people. Find out what there is locally for you to become involved in.
Look online and in the local papers for ideas. Be adventurous and follow up all the possibilities you come across.
My e-leaflet on Finding The Love Of Your Life can help.
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