I had hot sex with a guy I met at a club but he got into a relationship the very next day

I was in this club with a group of girlfriends for the birthday of one of them but I met a really fit guy when I went up to the bar to get a round of drinks.

We chatted and quickly started flirting.

The two of us ended up spending the rest of the evening together and went back to my flat at the end of the night.

We started kissing as soon as we got through the door. The next thing we were undressing one another.

The sex was awesome — the best I have had in a long while.

I thought we had the beginnings of a great relationship and he seemed really into me.

The next morning he told me he was also dating someone else but wasn’t ready for a relationship.

I was really upset, especially as I then saw on Facebook that he had updated his relationship status and is with this other girl, even though we’d been having sex the day before.

I am 24. This guy is 27. I have been single for around a year. Since then I have been looking for a person who treats me right.

My last relationship was very controlling.

I tend to have sex with men straight away as I would rather know if they are using me for sex from the start.

A few of the men I’ve met, mostly through dating apps, have said they would like to date me or get to know me better. So we go on dates, but as we date and continue having sex, they all seem to find some other girl and then ­suddenly drop me for them.

How do I keep the men interested in just me so they don’t start looking elsewhere for something better

How do I get them to see me as relationship material instead of just a friend with benefits?


AROUND 85,000 women are raped in England and Wales every year and the rapist is more likely to be known to the woman.

The abuse of power leaves victims scarred.

For my e-leaflet Have You Been Raped? email the address [email protected].

DEIDRE SAYS: If you have sex the first night you meet a guy, they think that is what you want – sex.

They tend to assume that you are operating by the same standards they do. So even if you have met someone you really like, they are unlikely to see it as a longer-term thing.

You are giving out signals that suggest you don’t mind how badly you are treated, so make a firm decision that you won’t have sex so quickly in future. Instead build friendships which will lead to real relationships.

You deserve so much better but may need help to value yourself more highly. My e-leaflet on Raising Self-Esteem will help you to build positive feelings about yourself.

Keep your social life busy and give yourself the chance to meet a guy who wants you 100 per cent.

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