DEAR DEIDRE: IT’S been two years since my partner was last interested in having sex, and I’m going mad with frustration.
I’m sick of being rejected and my confidence is at an all-time low.
What can I do?
I’m 50 and he is 53. We’ve been together for 20 years.
We always had a healthy sex life but over the past few years he has become less and less interested.
At first, I put it down to stress but then he admitted having erection problems.
He promised to go to the doctor, but never went.
I use sex toys to deal with my physical frustration but what I really want is for us to be intimate like we used to.
He promises things will change but they never do.
I feel so unattractive and unwanted. Although I love him, I feel too young to give up on having sex for ever.
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DEIDRE SAYS: There is clearly something going on with your partner that he won’t address.
Perhaps he is depressed or has a health issue – or he’s scared or embarrassed by his inability to perform.
Whatever the reason, burying his head in the sand is not the answer.
Explain the effect this is having on you.
Tell him it’s important he sees a doctor – not just for your sex life but for his general health.
My support pack, Erection Problems, explains more. Reading the one called Sex Play Therapy together could help re-establish intimacy.
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